Some times I think I must have a Bipolar life… I know that I don’t actually have bipolar disorder but the highs and lows in my life are so tremendous at times, I can very quickly go from being on cloud nine, feeling wonderful to feeling the world is against me as another piece of crap hits the fan so to speak and I wonder what is going wrong. When I am in the mediocre stages I sit back and think I’m sure that most people’s lives are pretty much the same… although to be fair the bad things most people have to deal with really do not compare with some of the horrendous stuff that I have been through. Anyone who knows me will tell you that I have undisputedly had way more than my fair share of crap to deal with!! and still it keeps on coming. And, as is probably common with most people’s situations, it always seems to be just as you think you are getting back on your feet that the next load of hardship is thrown at you. Furthermore it then also seems to be immediately followed by yet more stress and upset, hence people sayings ‘It all comes at once’ ‘one step forwards, two steps back’ and so forth.
While anyone will tell you, and I believe it myself, that when these things happen the best thing to do is not let it get you down, pick yourself up – brush yourself off and plough on. In reality the strength it takes to do that can be very hard to find, at times you even wonder if you even want to bother!!!
Don’t get me wrong I have a lot to be thankful for but when the hard times hit you tend to lose sight of the good things. At these times well meaning people will tell you to ‘be positive’ and ‘focus on the good things’ then get frustrated at you when you struggle to do this!! 😦 yet the majority of them will fall into the same trap themselves when things are going badly for them! or if they don’t have that problem then they really haven’t had an experience (or multiple experiences!) that have brought them that low and if that is the case they don’t have a cat in hells chance of understanding what it is like to have reached the bottom and feel there is no way to climb back up.
At the moment I am experiencing a low point and trying hard not to let it knock me off balance too much. I think talking about it helps – but I can’t really talk about the actual situation on here, or even with some of the people I would normally look to for support at times like this, which obviously makes it harder still! Yet I think just by writing this blog I have got a bit off my chest, who knows maybe someone will read it who feels the same way and therefore feels reassured to know they are not alone!!
When it seems the world is against you, don’t feel worse because everyone is telling you to ‘keep your chin up’ ‘think positive’ or whatever. Just remember we are all allowed and entitled to feel some self pity at times – God knows we’ve earnt the right to feel hard done by!!, the only important thing is that we don’t allow it to consume us and once we’ve taken a bit of selfish time to wallow THEN we pick ourselves up brush ourselves up, stick our middle finger to the world and move on…
Enjoy life… we only have one!! 🙂
- Which celebrities have Borderline Personality Disorder? (showard76.wordpress.com)
- BPD Did You Know (untreatableonline.com)
- Blog Round Up – The Three C’s and BPD (showard76.wordpress.com)
- How do I live with Borderline Personality Disorder? (showard76.wordpress.com)
- #30dayblog – Day 7 – A Day In The Life… (showard76.wordpress.com)
- Returning to work after a BPD crisis (showard76.wordpress.com)
- Self Destruction Seems to be My Holy Grail (gypsy116.wordpress.com)
- this sounds kind of familiar (clfrnkxn.wordpress.com)
- I think im bipolar (catatonicinmyhead.wordpress.com)
- Living With Bipolar Disorder (bats0711.wordpress.com)
- The Elephant in My Life (runningnakedwithscissors.wordpress.com)
- As promised, bipolar no more! (nomorevictim.wordpress.com)
- Obsessive compulsive disorder commonly coupled with depression and bipolar disorder (skwillms.wordpress.com)
- Could my bipolar brother develop schizophrenia? (cnn.com)
- Diary of a bipolar breakdown (thesun.co.uk)
- “I swear I’m bipolar this week” (purplepersuasion.wordpress.com)
- Write thinking: of things bipolar and others relationship (bensyen.wordpress.com)
- On what you call yourself: getting past diagnostic labels (hopeworkscommunity.wordpress.com)
- Bipolar affective disorder symptoms n warnings (cutie79.wordpress.com)
- Attack of the irritable bipolar lady – now with new laser eyes! (purplepersuasion.wordpress.com)
- Am I Recovering From my Bipolar Episode?? (bipolar2happiness.com)