Well, I’ve made it through three weeks back at work now! To help me adjust without overdoing it I have been working just 3 days per week for 3.5 hours a day. Next week I am increasing my hours to 4.5 hours a day, still 3 days, but it means I will be doing the full afternoon, hopefully this increase wont be too much that it will ‘rock the boat’ as it is so easy to go too far too soon. You may not think an extra hour is much, but believe me if you had the problems I’ve had you would be worried about it! The main reason I feel able to attempt the extra time is that the stress, anxiety and panic that was filling me each day in the first two weeks has now subsided in the third week, so I think I am adjusting at last. If the increase goes well next week, then I am thinking of adding an extra day the week after, but lets just focus on the extra time for now. One step at a time!
One thing I am hoping won’t cause me to slip up is the fact that I am making a step toward quitting smoking. I am using E-lites electronic cigarettes to help me cut down gradually. I may be taking on too much trying to quit smoking whilst gradually increasing my working time, but the two do go hand in hand really as I can’t smoke as much when I’m at work anyway – only on my break. Again I’m not going to rush with it, just take it as it comes and see how I get on. It has already meant I am smoking about 5 less cigarettes in a day, so I would say that’s not bad going really!??
The final part of this update is more good news. I have FINALLY had an appointment with a therapist. On Thursday I went to see her for the first time. The only bad thing is I am having to pay privately because I still haven’t heard anything from my NHS referral 😦 The first appointment went well, it was really a bit of another ‘assessment’ (as if I haven’t had enough of those already!) but I understand why it has to be this way, the therapist needs to know if my problems are something she can work with, and I need to know if I can open up and be honest with her, so I can work with her. We both felt that we can work together so I go back next week to start ‘working’ through my problems, fingers crossed this will be useful and help make a difference to the difficulties I face, time will tell.
Baby steps with each thing, at least they are all positive things 🙂
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